The Rift 2008, Report of the Rift

On whether John wants to give Ianto a good hard shagging
Yeah, because John is a time slut. James was worried when he got the part that the character would be too similar to Spike, especially with the British accent he used. But then he soon realised that Spike is monogamous and entirely devoted to the one he loves, whereas John will happily shag anything with a zip code.

So, you know, if John could get Ianto in a room by himself…

On stunt acting in movies
It's different, because in TV, they have stuntmen for everything, but in movies, not so much. Apparently, his stuntman in Dragonball didn't really look like him, so the director just ask him to smash his body against the wall. Which disconcerted him slightly.

On whether he's a bad boy, hero or sexy geek
"Sexy geek. What's that?"

On Supergirl
This came up A LOT. It's James' brilliant idea for a new TV show, in which Gareth somehow ends up playing "Stephen Hawking's grandson with muscle". I hope to God this gets made, purely for the sheer crap-tastic-ness of it.

On John Barrowman
Obligatory gushing about John. He was alarmed by John when he first met him, because John is "really out there sexually – I mean, with his sexuality".

On whether he's ever got an erection while filming a scene
"No. Nice try. I get them plenty of other times, though…"

On advice for struggling actors
He said that every human being is beautiful and interesting enough to tell their stories. Actors have a tendency to cover up who they are with some carefully thought out plan, but what they should do is just learn their lines, just show up and just do it, and accept the fact that they're interesting. It was all very sentimental.

On P.S. I Love You
It was so horrible. He felt his character was so boring compared to everyone else. He learnt from that film that he has to stand up and fight for himself.

On which voice he would like to have on his GPS/sat-nav
He didn't known what a sat-nav system was. He admitted that he's not very good with technology and is still learning to use his cell phone. He even takes offence to telephones because he hates the fact that people can just call him with no warning.

On his music
He expressed his desire to do an album of just him and his guitar. According to other people, he sings better when he's playing guitar - something about his stomach and vibrations and his guitar telling him the rights notes. I didn't really get it.

On what he did to embarrass John Barrowman
"I don't remember. Something about his penis? Was it huge?"

On whether he's a member of the mile high club
"Yeah. Somewhere on the border between China and Pakistan."

He's also dated a porn star called 'Felony'.

On a Torchwood musical
It would be easy for him, because he's a singer. With Buffy's 'Once More With Feeling', he and Tony Head were completely comfortable with the idea, while everyone else was freaking out. It didn't take long for Sarah Michelle Gellar to realise that she wasn't going to get out of Joss' musical, so she buckled down and hired a coach for her voice. James seemed to really respect her for that kind of dedication.

On handling weaponry in the series
He's good with swords and knives (the result of doing Shakespeare plays), but he doesn't like guns – they're not sexy. With John's sword, the prop department apparently told him, "Don't take the sword out of its sheath. You will die."

On kissing John Barrowman
More obligatory gushing about John B. John is a real life hero and John seems to care more about the others than himself, even when he's injured himself. James said: "I would rather kiss John than any other actress."

He then told how his girlfriend found them kissing really hot. When they were filming it, they would turn to her and ask her if it was good, and she would tell them that they should do it again.

On whether he's ever dressed in drag
Yes, in Chance. And in the Rocky Horror Picture Show when he was younger – playing the lead, of course.

On his favourite character Shakespeare character
Macbeth, because he likes how the character's evil is "a product of human decision".

Amusingly, he ranted about how he doesn't understand why actors always want to play HAMLET. For him, that play is basically: Hamlet kills his dad, then spends three hours talking about – yeah, great. Hamlet, in his opinion, is merely "an ego-trip for Shakespeare".

(I'm guessing he didn't know that Monsieur David Tennant, who has been raving about the character for ages, is starring in Hamlet this summer.)

On what question he would ask James Marsters to embarrass him
James: "Probably something about the first time I had sex."
Brilliant Random Person: "Alone or with someone else?"

On being immortalized by Buffy the Vampire Slayer
He was nervous about the fact he was going to spend a lot of Season Six naked with one sock on. He told Joss Whedon he needed two months to get ready physically for those scenes, and Joss replied, "Start getting ready. Now."

James Marsters & Gareth David-Lloyd[
On doing green screen acting
It sucks.

On what they'd retcon in their lives
There's not enough retcon for that. Since they're both artists, there's a lot they want to forget.

James: "We're both weirdos."
Gareth: "Well, I'm not quite as weird as James."

On Captain John and Ianto
James: "Ianto is smarter than Captain John. I mean, he's a slick guy. When in danger, Ianto would just pull out some device."
[Gareth looks alarmed]

There was some chatter about the possibility of a Jack/Ianto/John triangle, and then Gareth came out with The Gareth-ism Of The Day:

"Can I have two Captains with a Ianto-filling, please? Toasted."

*mass fangirl explosion*

On Supergirl (again)
Gareth: "He won't shut up about Supergirl. It's going to be all over the Internet soon. It'll be next week's fanfic. Two Captains. Ianto-filling. In walks Supergirl and Stephen Hawking's grandson. Hey, look, that girl in the audience is writing it down right now!"

On who would play Supergirl
James: "Laura Vandervoort."
Gareth: "She's rubbish. RUBBISH!"

On a suitable song to describe for their character
Gareth: "'Final Countdown'. (pause) A stopwatch in hand."

On each other
James: "Gareth is the best actor I've worked with for fifteen years."

AND THEN

Gareth: "If I'd known I was going to be with James [when I watched Buffy and Angel], I would have cried."

On what they believe in
At this, James launched into a long-winded explanation of string theory/m-theory – particle physics, eleventh dimension, space-time fold, thousands of universes, one of which must have God, blah blah blah. Gareth just finished with "Awesome."

On their swords
Infinitely long, infinitely thick.

On being affected by the Writer's Strike in the U.S>
James: "I wasn't at all. I came over to the BBC, then did Dragonball, so by the time I returned, they'd finished trying to destroy my career."

Gareth: "[When he did Torchwood], he said he wasn't going to leave. Then he left."
James: "But Dragon—"
Gareth: (hissy) "Don't talk about Dragonball!"
James: "C'mon, man, if you had ask me to stay, I would've."

On what other TV show they watch
James: "I'm weird. I don't watch TV. I just watch CNN, the Discovery Channel, the History Channel…"
Gareth: "Pretentious."
James: "…"
Gareth: (eye-roll) "Anyway, I watched Star Trek, Buffy, the Sopranos, Six Feet Under…"

(There were more, but I've forgotten them.)

On who they'd like to play themselves in a movie of their life
Gareth: "James. (looks at James) You've got to say me now!"
James: "Edward Norton."
Gareth: (offended) "Brad Pitt."